The Meaning of Candy
Over the past week I've spent a lot of time making a real story out of "Porcelain." I refuse to post it, though, as I realize that the character I later write of quite loathingly is basically my ideal vision of myself. Freaky!!!
"I'd like a Kit Kat." Seems like a rather simple statement doesn't it? Apparently, it demands a response: "what flavor Kit Kat do you want?" "What do you mean, 'what flavor?' Get me a fucking Kit Kat!" But it's not that simple. You have your wine Kit Kat, maccha (powdered green tea) Kit Kat, passion fruit Kit Kat, your cherry (the flower not the fruit) Kit Kat, your white chocolate Kit Kat, your dulce du leche Kit Kat, etc. and so forth. I even bought a Kit Kat recently that came with the new Kimura Kaela single.
So, the future of numerous students has been decided, namely whether they will continue to run the gauntlet of endless studying for entrance exams or drop out and do something marginally useful. I saw a student going into an exam with a pair of Kit Kats, and I, being hungry and a bit greedy, ask him if I can have one. His reply, "absolutely not!" It's difficult to describe how rude abruptness is in Japanese, so you're just going to have to believe me that it is. But you see, he dare not give away his precious Kit Kat at such an important time.
Why?
A linguistic oddity: two candy bars are Kit Kats and one is a Kit Kat. Transliterate the former into Japanese, and you get "kitto katsu," which interestingly enough is homophonous with the phrase that means "I'll definitely succeed." However, take away that precious English s and transliterate again. What do you get? "Kitto Katto," which would be "definitely cut." If he were to give away one of his Kit Kats, he'd literally be tempting fate. Considering how apoplectic students get about exams in this country, I can see why he reacted the way he did.
The Kit Kat, then, is no longer food; it is now a kind of totem or charm, like the little badges you can buy at shrines to promote success in business, fertility, or good health. To eat the candy would destroy its lingui-mystical power. All of this is my long winded way of explaining why I think they taste like crap.
posted by Nicholas Theisen @ 9:09 AM
8 comments
8 Comments:
But wait, if he has an even number of Kit Kats, isn't that bad luck too?
My head is SPINNING.
Giving things in even numbers is tricky; the rule is generally not to give anything evenly divisible to couples, so as to prevent them from splitting. It's traditional to give 10,000yen as a wedding gift, because it's a single bill (that's about $100).
The Breaktown website suggests you purchase 3, so in case you succumb to hunger, you still perserve the magic plural. Or, if you're more cynical, it's an attempt to get people to buy more.
what do you mean the japanese are absurdly prone to ritual? i never go to an exam without my lucky hello kitty pencil case. it's a recipe for failing great books.
You made it up, the student story... I could see right through it, use a poor virtual student as an example for your dabblings into lingui-mysticism...
Storytelling, my son, is a neverending practice... (Or so they say)
errrr... dead puppies, dead puppies...
"Lingui-mysticism": I think the Romanian may have stumbled on the secret title of Nicholas' blog.
And no, Jon, the recipe for failing Great Books has nothing to do with Hello Kitty pencil cases: it has to do with being in my section. I'm an equal-opportunity ball-crusher.
I'm off to Kroger to buy beer to drink by myself while I read Foucault and Plato.
Nostra amica Romania is, of course, correct, I made up the story, but more because I needed to tell it in the first person in order for the whole thing to make sense. The truth, "so like one time, my friend was talking to her students" would sound downright stupid.
The fact remains students do purchase multiple kitkats for this reason and never eat them.
I need to stop objectifying Japanese people. I have a feeling if half the people I know spoke better English and found this site, I'd be in for a veritable ice age.
I just don't understand why you had to make it seem like you like Kit Kats, Nicholas. I can see telling it in the first person for narrative effect, but really, don't lead us all on about whether or not you like Kit Kats. That's just cruel.
Oh Nicholas, why did you lie and claim the story as your own? It wouldn't have made any difference! All of my interesting stories come from other people anyway.
And no, you're not "objectifying" the Japanese, Nicholas. I'm sure you're well on your way to seeing yourself as being just as strange in their eyes too - you're not shallow enough to avoid that trap entirely, now are you? Tee hee.
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